Where you're so bored you almost WANT to do something productive, but at the same time so blah feeling that you can't quite muster up the energy? That's how I feel today.
Dan is taking a nap (yes, this is Hilary writing) because he's been sick for the past few days. He ended up not preaching on Sunday night. Any time he gets sick beyond his normal every day sick, I freak out. I'm always convinced he's suddenly on his deathbed. Something tells me this is not healthy.
His being sick always frustrates me so much because I am so HELPLESS. I can't do anything about it. I can't even make him go see a doctor, because the odds are 20 to 1 that it is just his sinuses, therefore the doctor can't do anything, therefore why waste money? I vary between agreeing with his assessment on this and being desperate to do ANYTHING that will get him healthy faster. It hurts me so much to see him sick and know there is nothing I can do. The only cure is sinus medicine and lots of sleep. Sometimes I want to yell at God and ask why He made Dan with faulty sinuses. But of course 1 that's a theological inaccuracy, and 2 I have a feeling sinuses are just Dan's (and by extension one of my) thorn in the side.
Is there such thing as a mid-internship doldrums? Cause I think I have a bad case of that. Nothing is shiny-new anymore, and the time left seems to both stretch out before me like a never ending ocean and crunch up like a tiny puddle. There is practically no time left. There is too much time left. It is a contradiction I don't quite know how to process. I suffer from a sense of urgency (everything must get done NOW) and a sense of lackadaisicalness (I have plenty of time to get everything done) and it's kind of gotten me paralyzed.
One thing I've noticed is that strengths and weaknesses are never just strengths or just weaknesses. Both are a combination of both. A strength of Dan's and my marriage is that we push and inspire each other. A weakness is that neither of us likes to get anything done unless we are working together. It's two sides of one problem and the balancing point is very narrow indeed.
All right, well you should probably just ignore my random musings. It's just one of those days.
Love,
Hilary
Tuesday, June 30, 2009
Saturday, June 27, 2009
Angry Security Guards
Today was our big scavenger hunt / initiation event for incoming seventh graders. The event itself went swimmingly. The kids really seemed to enjoy it (one even said it was one of his favorite events ever) and the newcomers were accepted into the group with open arms by the youth group "veterans."
The teens were very well-behaved, and respectful of the mall, although we expected no less from them. Apparently, however, this particular mall is very teenager-prejudiced, because we'd only been there for an hour or so when the security guards found us and told us that scavenger hunts were against mall policy and demanded that we leave. Whaaaaat? Well, we immediately offered to end the scavenger hunt and just commence shopping, which is what we were planning on doing after the scavenger hunt ANYWAY (it's not like the mall wasn't going to get any business from us!!!) but he told us again that we had to leave immediately. Those were "his orders" (yeah right, as you shall soon see.) So we rounded up the kids and they sadly brought the scavenger hunt to a halt, as we prepared to leave the mall.
Dan went to talk to the mall office to see if anything could be done to allow us to stay. We were all pretty upset at this ridiculous "rule." If the kids had been rowdy and disruptive I would have understood, but as it was, we know they were not. Well, the mall office seemed flabbergasted that we had been told to leave, and only told us we had to quit the scavenger hunt, we were welcome to stay and shop. We told the kids the good news and prepared to stay and enjoy the mall. Several kids hugged Dan in appreciation for fixing it.
The rest of the trip was fairly uneventful, except for some of the girls who got fake piercings and scared Hilary into thinking they were real. They laughed and said their parents would kill them... Hilary cheerfully replied that she would kill them first.
At the end of the trip there was some minor frustration with miscommunication between kids and their parents as to whether they were to be picked up or dropped off. That was unfortunate and caused some strife, but hopefully we can move past that.
All in all, a successful day... hopefully the mall learns its lesson! One store owner even said he was going to complain to the mall... he LIKED the scavenger hunt!
Love,
Dan and Hilary
The teens were very well-behaved, and respectful of the mall, although we expected no less from them. Apparently, however, this particular mall is very teenager-prejudiced, because we'd only been there for an hour or so when the security guards found us and told us that scavenger hunts were against mall policy and demanded that we leave. Whaaaaat? Well, we immediately offered to end the scavenger hunt and just commence shopping, which is what we were planning on doing after the scavenger hunt ANYWAY (it's not like the mall wasn't going to get any business from us!!!) but he told us again that we had to leave immediately. Those were "his orders" (yeah right, as you shall soon see.) So we rounded up the kids and they sadly brought the scavenger hunt to a halt, as we prepared to leave the mall.
Dan went to talk to the mall office to see if anything could be done to allow us to stay. We were all pretty upset at this ridiculous "rule." If the kids had been rowdy and disruptive I would have understood, but as it was, we know they were not. Well, the mall office seemed flabbergasted that we had been told to leave, and only told us we had to quit the scavenger hunt, we were welcome to stay and shop. We told the kids the good news and prepared to stay and enjoy the mall. Several kids hugged Dan in appreciation for fixing it.
The rest of the trip was fairly uneventful, except for some of the girls who got fake piercings and scared Hilary into thinking they were real. They laughed and said their parents would kill them... Hilary cheerfully replied that she would kill them first.
At the end of the trip there was some minor frustration with miscommunication between kids and their parents as to whether they were to be picked up or dropped off. That was unfortunate and caused some strife, but hopefully we can move past that.
All in all, a successful day... hopefully the mall learns its lesson! One store owner even said he was going to complain to the mall... he LIKED the scavenger hunt!
Love,
Dan and Hilary
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
Counting Our Blessings
This is Hilary posting...
Dan and I have shared about the many hardships we have faced, including times of doubt, times of faith testing, and our seemingly never ending struggle with insomnia and fatigue. I just thought I would take some time to also post about our blessings.
First of all, we are surrounded here by people who are truly living their Christian faith. This church is a family, and they have welcomed us with open arms. We are now a part of this family, surrounded by their love and encouragement. I do not think we could be in a better place for a learning environment. We are loved and accepted for who we are and challenged and encouraged to grow and be better. They take care of us. We are so blessed.
Secondly, we are figuratively surrounded by you all, our dearest friends and family. There are so many people out there both interested in keeping up with our lives and praying for us. We are uplifted and supported by your love and prayers. Though you are not with us physically, you are with us in your hearts and in ours, and we are so grateful for your presence in our lives now, and the influences each and every one of you had in getting us to this point.
Thirdly, we are hugely blessed to have each other. When one of us is down, the other helps to bring a smile back to their face. We truly complement each other in every way. My strengths are in areas where Dan has weaknesses, and Dan's strengths are in areas where I have weaknesses. Together we make an awesome team, and being able to work together to hone those skills and become a better team is just awesome.
Fourthly, we have been blessed by a great group of teens to work with. They are polite and well-behaved. We are not kept over-busy disciplining, so youth nights go smoothly. They seem to have taken a shine to us; they listen to us and respect us. They are unique individuals, each of them wonderful in their own way, and as a collective group the best "starter group" we could have hoped for.
Of course, there are many more blessings in our lives at the moment, but those are the big four. God has blessed us beyond our wildest imaginations, and even though there are hard times and rough spots in the midst of all these blessings, God is using even them to bless us, by stretching us and helping us to grow, to depend evermore on Him.
Thank you, all of you, for being a part of this journey with us. Your support and prayers are appreciated more than you know.
Love,
Hilary
Dan and I have shared about the many hardships we have faced, including times of doubt, times of faith testing, and our seemingly never ending struggle with insomnia and fatigue. I just thought I would take some time to also post about our blessings.
First of all, we are surrounded here by people who are truly living their Christian faith. This church is a family, and they have welcomed us with open arms. We are now a part of this family, surrounded by their love and encouragement. I do not think we could be in a better place for a learning environment. We are loved and accepted for who we are and challenged and encouraged to grow and be better. They take care of us. We are so blessed.
Secondly, we are figuratively surrounded by you all, our dearest friends and family. There are so many people out there both interested in keeping up with our lives and praying for us. We are uplifted and supported by your love and prayers. Though you are not with us physically, you are with us in your hearts and in ours, and we are so grateful for your presence in our lives now, and the influences each and every one of you had in getting us to this point.
Thirdly, we are hugely blessed to have each other. When one of us is down, the other helps to bring a smile back to their face. We truly complement each other in every way. My strengths are in areas where Dan has weaknesses, and Dan's strengths are in areas where I have weaknesses. Together we make an awesome team, and being able to work together to hone those skills and become a better team is just awesome.
Fourthly, we have been blessed by a great group of teens to work with. They are polite and well-behaved. We are not kept over-busy disciplining, so youth nights go smoothly. They seem to have taken a shine to us; they listen to us and respect us. They are unique individuals, each of them wonderful in their own way, and as a collective group the best "starter group" we could have hoped for.
Of course, there are many more blessings in our lives at the moment, but those are the big four. God has blessed us beyond our wildest imaginations, and even though there are hard times and rough spots in the midst of all these blessings, God is using even them to bless us, by stretching us and helping us to grow, to depend evermore on Him.
Thank you, all of you, for being a part of this journey with us. Your support and prayers are appreciated more than you know.
Love,
Hilary
Sunday, June 21, 2009
A post from Dan!
God has really been testing my faith lately. Or maybe it isn’t God at all; maybe it’s Satan trying to keep me down. I’m not really sure which one, but whatever it is, it is causing me to lose focus. I can’t sleep at night. Over the past 72 hours I’ve slept about 9 hours. My whole body is racked with pain. I’m not really sure what to do at this point, because no matter how exhausted I feel, I can’t fall asleep.
There was a loss at the church this week. A young man, who was married with two small children, had some kind of heart condition and died Thursday morning. The whole church is in a state of shock. There are a lot of tears and it’s been making me think of my mother. Also a friend back home just lost her father unexpectedly. It seems like this has been happening a lot lately. My faith tells me that God can do miraculous things from bad situations and I’ve seen that very thing happen in my own life, but this string of untimely deaths has really shaken me. I still believe in God and I still believe he can do wondrous things, but my spirit is broken right now and everything is so gloomy.
On a lighter note, Hilary and I went to the mall yesterday. We are planning a welcoming event for the upcoming youth next week and we are doing a scavenger hunt through the mall. So we spent a few hours just going from store to store finding random things and writing down the prices. When we actually set the teens loose they will have the name of the items and they will have to find them and tell us the price of the item to verify that they found it. I think it’s going to be a lot of fun and hopefully we’ll see a lot of new faces to add to the youth group for the summer.
God has really been testing my faith lately. Or maybe it isn’t God at all; maybe it’s Satan trying to keep me down. I’m not really sure which one, but whatever it is, it is causing me to lose focus. I can’t sleep at night. Over the past 72 hours I’ve slept about 9 hours. My whole body is racked with pain. I’m not really sure what to do at this point, because no matter how exhausted I feel, I can’t fall asleep.
There was a loss at the church this week. A young man, who was married with two small children, had some kind of heart condition and died Thursday morning. The whole church is in a state of shock. There are a lot of tears and it’s been making me think of my mother. Also a friend back home just lost her father unexpectedly. It seems like this has been happening a lot lately. My faith tells me that God can do miraculous things from bad situations and I’ve seen that very thing happen in my own life, but this string of untimely deaths has really shaken me. I still believe in God and I still believe he can do wondrous things, but my spirit is broken right now and everything is so gloomy.
On a lighter note, Hilary and I went to the mall yesterday. We are planning a welcoming event for the upcoming youth next week and we are doing a scavenger hunt through the mall. So we spent a few hours just going from store to store finding random things and writing down the prices. When we actually set the teens loose they will have the name of the items and they will have to find them and tell us the price of the item to verify that they found it. I think it’s going to be a lot of fun and hopefully we’ll see a lot of new faces to add to the youth group for the summer.
Wednesday, June 17, 2009
The Great Soda Mystery
This sounds like a case for Nancy Drew!
Or a kindergarten class... you know?
"Who stole the soda from the Holtz's fridge? SteveO stole the soda from the Holtz's fridge. (Who me?) Yes you! (Couldn't be!) Then WHO???"
Yes, WHO stole the soda from our fridge is what we are asking today. This morning, at breakfast, there were 8 cans of soda in our fridge. At lunch, there was only one. 2 cans of Mountain Dew, 2 cans of Game Fuel, and 3 cans of Pepsi mysteriously disappeared. Yes, the fridge is in the church kitchen, which is public space. But it is CLEARLY marked "Holtz Fridge" and the people in the church KNOW that the stuff in it is not for public use. Needless to say, we're pretty upset. Soda is kind of expensive and therefore usually a splurge for us. We found a GREAT deal last week and bought enough soda for pretty much the entire summer. Now, a week's worth is gone. We are frustrated and sad and mad. We are trying to be graceful and not sin in our anger. We don't even care if the culprit is caught, we just hope we can do something so a repeat of this doesn't happen, but we don't even know what could be done. After all, we don't even know HOW this happened in the first place. As far as we know, nobody was even in the church today, and we know the soda was there THIS MORNING!
Grr.
With frustration,
Dan and Hilary
Or a kindergarten class... you know?
"Who stole the soda from the Holtz's fridge? SteveO stole the soda from the Holtz's fridge. (Who me?) Yes you! (Couldn't be!) Then WHO???"
Yes, WHO stole the soda from our fridge is what we are asking today. This morning, at breakfast, there were 8 cans of soda in our fridge. At lunch, there was only one. 2 cans of Mountain Dew, 2 cans of Game Fuel, and 3 cans of Pepsi mysteriously disappeared. Yes, the fridge is in the church kitchen, which is public space. But it is CLEARLY marked "Holtz Fridge" and the people in the church KNOW that the stuff in it is not for public use. Needless to say, we're pretty upset. Soda is kind of expensive and therefore usually a splurge for us. We found a GREAT deal last week and bought enough soda for pretty much the entire summer. Now, a week's worth is gone. We are frustrated and sad and mad. We are trying to be graceful and not sin in our anger. We don't even care if the culprit is caught, we just hope we can do something so a repeat of this doesn't happen, but we don't even know what could be done. After all, we don't even know HOW this happened in the first place. As far as we know, nobody was even in the church today, and we know the soda was there THIS MORNING!
Grr.
With frustration,
Dan and Hilary
As per Stephen's request
This is Dan!
Hey everyone, another late night post from me. It seems like I'm having a lot of late nights lately. Mostly due to the fact that Hilary and I are having a hard time getting on a regular sleeping schedule.
Anyway I am starting to feel a whole lot better about where I stand with this internship. Hilary is going to teach the lesson on wednesday and she has come up with a really awesome idea. We are speaking on parables all summer long as mentioned before, so this week we'll be doing the parable of the sower. She is going to use how the different places that the seeds fell to represent different points in our faith journey. I thought it was a fantastic idea.
We are also working on a destination unknown for the teens. It is a tradition at this church that all the upcoming youth members get kidnapped and brought to a secret event as an initiation. So we are going to do a scavenger hunt at the nearest mall, which is like 45 minutes away but w/e. I'm really looking forward to it. It'll be next saturday, June 27th.
Also on the 28th I'll be preaching. It's a sunday evening service but I'm really nervous. I've decided to speak on how when bad things happen, good things will come out of the ashes. I'm titling it "No rain, no rainbows" after the sprint commercial where they imagine what the world would be like if it were ran by movie crews. It cracks me up. I'll also be dealing with the story of Joseph and specifically how if he hadn't ended up in prison, he never would have become 2nd in command of Egypt and able to save his family from the famine.
Well that is all for now...more to come
Dan
This is Dan!
Hey everyone, another late night post from me. It seems like I'm having a lot of late nights lately. Mostly due to the fact that Hilary and I are having a hard time getting on a regular sleeping schedule.
Anyway I am starting to feel a whole lot better about where I stand with this internship. Hilary is going to teach the lesson on wednesday and she has come up with a really awesome idea. We are speaking on parables all summer long as mentioned before, so this week we'll be doing the parable of the sower. She is going to use how the different places that the seeds fell to represent different points in our faith journey. I thought it was a fantastic idea.
We are also working on a destination unknown for the teens. It is a tradition at this church that all the upcoming youth members get kidnapped and brought to a secret event as an initiation. So we are going to do a scavenger hunt at the nearest mall, which is like 45 minutes away but w/e. I'm really looking forward to it. It'll be next saturday, June 27th.
Also on the 28th I'll be preaching. It's a sunday evening service but I'm really nervous. I've decided to speak on how when bad things happen, good things will come out of the ashes. I'm titling it "No rain, no rainbows" after the sprint commercial where they imagine what the world would be like if it were ran by movie crews. It cracks me up. I'll also be dealing with the story of Joseph and specifically how if he hadn't ended up in prison, he never would have become 2nd in command of Egypt and able to save his family from the famine.
Well that is all for now...more to come
Dan
Sunday, June 14, 2009
Plauged by Doubt
Ahhh Sunday School... what can I say?
For a long time I've had an idea to do Sunday School lessons through hymns. So since I volunteered to do the youth Sunday School, I decided now would be the perfect time to try that idea out. I started this morning with "All Creatures of Our God and King" which is about 800 years old. These are the lyrics:
All creatures of our God and King
Lift up your voice and with us sing,
Alleluia! Alleluia!
Thou burning sun with golden beam,
Thou silver moon with softer gleam!
O praise Him! O praise Him!
Alleluia! Alleluia! Alleluia!
Thou rushing wind that art so strong
Ye clouds that sail in Heaven along,
O praise Him! Alleluia!
Thou rising moon, in praise rejoice,
Ye lights of evening, find a voice!
O praise Him! O praise Him!
Alleluia! Alleluia! Alleluia!
Thou flowing water, pure and clear,
Make music for thy Lord to hear,
O praise Him! Alleluia!
Thou fire so masterful and bright,
That givest man both warmth and light.
O praise Him! O praise Him!
Alleluia! Alleluia! Alleluia!
Let all things their Creator bless,
And worship Him in humbleness,
O praise Him! Alleluia!
Praise, praise the Father, praise the Son,
And praise the Spirit, Three in One!
O praise Him! O praise Him!
Alleluia! Alleluia! Alleluia!
This is one of my personal favorite hymns, and so I decided it would be a good one to start with. The lesson was on the creation of God and how it displays the glory and character of God. I was prepared. I played the song, we discussed the lyrics, I actually got the kids talking and interacting... so why do I feel like I could have done so much better?
I just wonder... I wonder if they are actually getting it, you know? And how do I know if they get it? And I wonder if they "like" me or if they think what I'm teaching is totally lame. And I wonder if I'm encouraging them enough when they do give responses, or am I making them think it's not worth it? I wonder if they are taking any of it home with them, if it's going to "stick?"
And then I wonder if it even matters if it sticks. After all, out of my own life, there are maybe three or four lessons that really "stuck." The rest wasn't exactly in one ear and out the other, but it got crowded out pretty quickly. The thing that stuck with me was the love that was lavished on me and the example that was set. I should remember that... more than freaking out that each lesson is going to somehow be the magic lesson that is impressed upon their brain forever.
So I pray that I will love. I pray that I will lead by example. And yes, I pray that the lessons touch them; that we teach the truth, but mostly, I pray for love.
Love,
Hilary
Friday, June 12, 2009
(Bon)Fire
Tonight was our bonfire, which was really so small it was basically a campfire, which the kids called us out on. Geez, when I was in youth group a little tiny fire like that was considered a bonfire. Of course, it probably has something to do with the fact that it's totally rural out here. Out here, bonfire means BIG fire.
This event seemed to go much better than Wednesday night. Part of that is simply because it was more low key. I mean, it's hard to go wrong when all you're doing is hanging out. No pressure of a lesson or anything. There were probably 11 or 12 kids, a pretty good turn out. A couple of kids were not regular attenders but were guests of friends, so that's a good sign. We had a good time joking around and getting to know each other, and I was pleased by the way the group seemed to include everybody most of the time.
A couple of not-so-fun incidents happened. At the beginning of the night, one girl dropped a frog down another girl's sweatshirt, and it took us a long time to find it and get it out, and she was crying and freaking out. And I don't blame her one bit! Part of the reason I had such a hard time trying to find the frog and help her get it out was because I didn't want it to fall out and actually ::gasp:: TOUCH me! But we finally got it out and then I made Dan throw it somewhere where the kids couldn't find it again and get up to more mischief.
Also, at one point, more than half the kids around our bonfire (sorry, campfire) circle had their cell phones out and were completely not interacting with each other. What IS it with people and technology these days? Although, that was actually kind of a blessing in disguise. Dan and I quickly put a stop to it, and it gave us our first real chance to test our authority, so to speak. Would the kids actually listen to us, as young as we are? Fortunately, no one challenged us, and I was grateful for that. I hope they continue to listen to us. I know at least for me, it's scary to give direct orders, but I feel a little better now that I've had to do it and nobody rebelled.
So, all in all it was an exciting night. Plus, I ate s'mores, and you can never go wrong with that, right? Love you all,
Hilary
This event seemed to go much better than Wednesday night. Part of that is simply because it was more low key. I mean, it's hard to go wrong when all you're doing is hanging out. No pressure of a lesson or anything. There were probably 11 or 12 kids, a pretty good turn out. A couple of kids were not regular attenders but were guests of friends, so that's a good sign. We had a good time joking around and getting to know each other, and I was pleased by the way the group seemed to include everybody most of the time.
A couple of not-so-fun incidents happened. At the beginning of the night, one girl dropped a frog down another girl's sweatshirt, and it took us a long time to find it and get it out, and she was crying and freaking out. And I don't blame her one bit! Part of the reason I had such a hard time trying to find the frog and help her get it out was because I didn't want it to fall out and actually ::gasp:: TOUCH me! But we finally got it out and then I made Dan throw it somewhere where the kids couldn't find it again and get up to more mischief.
Also, at one point, more than half the kids around our bonfire (sorry, campfire) circle had their cell phones out and were completely not interacting with each other. What IS it with people and technology these days? Although, that was actually kind of a blessing in disguise. Dan and I quickly put a stop to it, and it gave us our first real chance to test our authority, so to speak. Would the kids actually listen to us, as young as we are? Fortunately, no one challenged us, and I was grateful for that. I hope they continue to listen to us. I know at least for me, it's scary to give direct orders, but I feel a little better now that I've had to do it and nobody rebelled.
So, all in all it was an exciting night. Plus, I ate s'mores, and you can never go wrong with that, right? Love you all,
Hilary
I know it's late but....
I can't really sleep so I thought I'd post a little update.
Today I took the day off to recoup from wednesday night. I've felt so bad all day I don't really know why. So I tried to rest up and just have a little fun today. I played video games all day and the only church related thing I did was worship band practice, which actually went really well. The instrumental special that we're putting together for sunday morning is coming together really nice. I'm actually really enjoying playing drums again. It's sorta carthartic and that's been really good for me, plus it's just plain fun.
Well that's all for now.
Thanks for all the prayers and kind words. I love you all and I hope you keep on reading our blog!
Dan
Today I took the day off to recoup from wednesday night. I've felt so bad all day I don't really know why. So I tried to rest up and just have a little fun today. I played video games all day and the only church related thing I did was worship band practice, which actually went really well. The instrumental special that we're putting together for sunday morning is coming together really nice. I'm actually really enjoying playing drums again. It's sorta carthartic and that's been really good for me, plus it's just plain fun.
Well that's all for now.
Thanks for all the prayers and kind words. I love you all and I hope you keep on reading our blog!
Dan
Wednesday, June 10, 2009
So my preaching needs a little work....
Well because Hilary already posted the events I won't give you a run down of the night again. However, I will tell you a few of my own thoughts on the evening.
I felt pretty good going in. The lesson was planned, we'd written a nice little role-play for the teens and we'd even had a theme for the summer planned out. Unfortunately as Hilary pointed out, not much went right. I feel less than adequate lately. My lesson seemed to fall flat, and I realize that was partly due to very little prep time.
Originally we had intended to use a lesson that I'd prepared for one of my classes last semester, but I found it was totally non existent tuesday morning, meaning we had to pull tonight together entirely in two days.
But I also feel like I'm not the same person I was when God called me to be a youth pastor. I still have a great heart for teens, but now that I'm actually here doing ministry, I'm feeling totally overwhelmed and thinking God must've made a mistake. I know that isn't true but it's how I feel. I also know that this is all probably due to the fact that I've had less than 2 weeks of ministry experience, but still I'm feeling like a failure. Your prayers are greatly appreciated because I'm not the best self motivated starter and I often procrastinate until the last possible minute, and as I'm discovering.....pastors do not work just one day a week!
I hope the teens will have fun this summer, but I know that will probably happen whether or not I try very hard, and so my real goal is to help them gain a better understanding of just how much God loves them. I also hope I can help them foster a greater love for God within themselves, but I feel like I'm just going to let them down.
I'm very discouraged about tonight, but I hope it will fuel me to be better throughout the course of the summer. Rome wasn't built in a day...or so they say.
Dan
I felt pretty good going in. The lesson was planned, we'd written a nice little role-play for the teens and we'd even had a theme for the summer planned out. Unfortunately as Hilary pointed out, not much went right. I feel less than adequate lately. My lesson seemed to fall flat, and I realize that was partly due to very little prep time.
Originally we had intended to use a lesson that I'd prepared for one of my classes last semester, but I found it was totally non existent tuesday morning, meaning we had to pull tonight together entirely in two days.
But I also feel like I'm not the same person I was when God called me to be a youth pastor. I still have a great heart for teens, but now that I'm actually here doing ministry, I'm feeling totally overwhelmed and thinking God must've made a mistake. I know that isn't true but it's how I feel. I also know that this is all probably due to the fact that I've had less than 2 weeks of ministry experience, but still I'm feeling like a failure. Your prayers are greatly appreciated because I'm not the best self motivated starter and I often procrastinate until the last possible minute, and as I'm discovering.....pastors do not work just one day a week!
I hope the teens will have fun this summer, but I know that will probably happen whether or not I try very hard, and so my real goal is to help them gain a better understanding of just how much God loves them. I also hope I can help them foster a greater love for God within themselves, but I feel like I'm just going to let them down.
I'm very discouraged about tonight, but I hope it will fuel me to be better throughout the course of the summer. Rome wasn't built in a day...or so they say.
Dan
If only one person went home bleeding, that means we did a good job... right?
Tonight was our first youth meeting. Well, we had one last week, but pizza and games don't count as us actually having to run the thing, teaching a lesson and all that jazz. So tonight the pressure was on. I guess the best way to sum it up is to say: at least we got through the announcements without any snags!
After announcements came worship, and there was our first mistake. We had forgotten to get the powerpoints with all the lyrics to the songs. So Daniel (not my Dan, one of the kids in the youth group) played a couple of more familiar songs, but the youth still couldn't sing along very easily. Most of them seemed totally bored and disengaged, and I'm not sure if it was the lack of lyrics to sing along to, or if that's their normal mode. Some of them still seemed into it, and I was grateful for that.
After worship we did a role play of a modernization of the story of the Good Samaritan. That, I thought, went really well. The kids acting and the kids watching seemed to get into it. Maybe a little TOO into it at times. :) Mistake number two happened after the role play. I was the all important "narrator" but had thought Dan was going to lead the discussion questions. But when I tried to turn it over to him, he thought I was going to lead them!!! I felt awful, like we looked bad in front of the teens, but I laughed it off and began leading the discussion. The discussion was a mixed bag. Some of the answers were really silly, but some of them went deeper. Overall, I thought that they grasped what we wanted them to grasp fairly well.
Unfortunately, I was almost done with what we'd prepared for discussion when I noticed mistake number three: Dan had forgotten his Bible. So I caught his eye and mouthed that to him. He got up and went to get his Bible (thank goodness we live in the church,) and I had to keep the discussion going until he got back. When he did, he was very much out of breath, since there are two full flights of stairs between our "house" and the youth room. So I read the story of the Good Samaritan so he could catch his breath.
There weren't any more outright mistakes throughout the night, but some things still didn't go as neatly as planned. The lesson was finished earlier than had planned, leaving us with a full 20 minutes to fill at the end of the night. Now, we had planned to play basketball as a fellowship / gaming time afterwards, but didn't know if it would hold the teens attention for that long. Fortunately the ones that didn't get into basketball began kicking a soccer ball around. It wasn't long until two of the basketball kids collided, and one wiped out spectacularly on the parking lot. She tore up both knees, an elbow, a foot, and even bruised her hip. She was very brave, and didn't even cry, but I feel bad. I know it was an accident, but I still feel somewhat responsible. Like if I had been watching closer... but what was I going to do, jump in and catch her and keep her from falling? I try to tell myself it wasn't my fault, but I still feel guilty, like I could have prevented it.
Well, keep praying for us. Some of the teens are opening up, and a couple told me they think we're alright, so I think we're beginning to make some connections. On the other hand, there are some teens who are very standoffish, and it's difficult to even get them to converse about mundane things. Pray especially for the bonfire. It's going to be very low-key, so I'm hoping we can get the teens to open up and get to know them more.
Love,
Hilary
After announcements came worship, and there was our first mistake. We had forgotten to get the powerpoints with all the lyrics to the songs. So Daniel (not my Dan, one of the kids in the youth group) played a couple of more familiar songs, but the youth still couldn't sing along very easily. Most of them seemed totally bored and disengaged, and I'm not sure if it was the lack of lyrics to sing along to, or if that's their normal mode. Some of them still seemed into it, and I was grateful for that.
After worship we did a role play of a modernization of the story of the Good Samaritan. That, I thought, went really well. The kids acting and the kids watching seemed to get into it. Maybe a little TOO into it at times. :) Mistake number two happened after the role play. I was the all important "narrator" but had thought Dan was going to lead the discussion questions. But when I tried to turn it over to him, he thought I was going to lead them!!! I felt awful, like we looked bad in front of the teens, but I laughed it off and began leading the discussion. The discussion was a mixed bag. Some of the answers were really silly, but some of them went deeper. Overall, I thought that they grasped what we wanted them to grasp fairly well.
Unfortunately, I was almost done with what we'd prepared for discussion when I noticed mistake number three: Dan had forgotten his Bible. So I caught his eye and mouthed that to him. He got up and went to get his Bible (thank goodness we live in the church,) and I had to keep the discussion going until he got back. When he did, he was very much out of breath, since there are two full flights of stairs between our "house" and the youth room. So I read the story of the Good Samaritan so he could catch his breath.
There weren't any more outright mistakes throughout the night, but some things still didn't go as neatly as planned. The lesson was finished earlier than had planned, leaving us with a full 20 minutes to fill at the end of the night. Now, we had planned to play basketball as a fellowship / gaming time afterwards, but didn't know if it would hold the teens attention for that long. Fortunately the ones that didn't get into basketball began kicking a soccer ball around. It wasn't long until two of the basketball kids collided, and one wiped out spectacularly on the parking lot. She tore up both knees, an elbow, a foot, and even bruised her hip. She was very brave, and didn't even cry, but I feel bad. I know it was an accident, but I still feel somewhat responsible. Like if I had been watching closer... but what was I going to do, jump in and catch her and keep her from falling? I try to tell myself it wasn't my fault, but I still feel guilty, like I could have prevented it.
Well, keep praying for us. Some of the teens are opening up, and a couple told me they think we're alright, so I think we're beginning to make some connections. On the other hand, there are some teens who are very standoffish, and it's difficult to even get them to converse about mundane things. Pray especially for the bonfire. It's going to be very low-key, so I'm hoping we can get the teens to open up and get to know them more.
Love,
Hilary
Our First Blog Post
Well, we've been at Lisbon for a week and a half now, and we've finally got a blog going. We've set this up so that we can keep in touch with our friends and let them know how the summer's going for us. So far...
Well, first of all we left Houghton a week ago Saturday. That was an adventure and a half, and I don't mean the good kind. All of our packing and transporting our stuff took HOURS longer than we thought it would. We intended to arrive at Lisbon at 5:00 pm. We left Houghton at 5:30. The car was packed so full that Hilary was driving, because her legs are shorter and it made more room. Well, after we ran into a parade and ran around the route for almost an hour trying to find SOMEONE who could give us directions (note to the world: Parade routes should NOT block important highway junctions) Hilary was too shaken and upset to drive anymore. So guess who had to drive with his legs all cramped up? You guessed it, Dan did!
We FINALLY found someone who could tell us how to get where we needed to go, and we got back on the road and headed for McDonald's, the only restaurant that we knew where it was on our journey. We were STARVING by that point, only to find out that... this particular Ronald only accepts cash. So we backtracked to an ATM, got cash, and finally got our food. Safe at last, right? WRONG. Things continued to go badly for us, as Hilary was even clumsy enough to spill salt in her Sprite. Gross!
Somewhere around 11:30 at night, we finally pulled into the parking lot of the church that will be home sweet home for us for the next ten weeks. And it will be a home for us. Even though we're living in a Sunday School classroom that has been turned into an apartment, it is one of the most homey places we've been. For one thing, the people here are amazingly welcoming and friendly. For another, they decorated this place better than our own apartment is decorated. All the colors even match!
Our time here has gone much better than our trip here. Monday we spent acclimating and unpacking, but Tuesday was our first youth meeting. Yikes! There were about 18 or so youth, and the first meeting was very low key. We shared our testimonies and had pizza. We are getting to know most of the youth by name, and are so excited to serve here. They seem like a good group... no rotten apples. They are very fun loving. We feel like God is calling us to help them go deeper, and with His help we want to do so. We've decided to focus on "story" as our theme for the summer. We want to teach them that they each have their own unique story and place in God's kingdom. We'll be using Jesus' parables to help us acheive that, starting tonight with the Good Samaritan.
We've also gotten involved with many other things going on around the church. Hilary helped out with MOPS (that's mothers of preschoolers) one morning as a glorified jungle gym. Who would have thought that three preschoolers could take her down? We've also helped the pastor's wife with a fundraiser for the local YFC, attended a young adults meeting, and helped out with VBS planning. This church, for its small size, has a ton of activities going on. Hilary has also gone to a Wesleyan Women's meeting and a prayer group, and that doesn't even touch the surface of some of the other things this church has to offer. There is truly something for everyone. We feel very blessed to be a part of the church here. Someone said that this is a good "starter church" and that's true. We hope that we can learn so much during our time here.
We don't want to make it sound like it's all peaches and cream and roses, but so far we have had a truly blessed time. Even when Dan was very sick for several days, it was like God's hand was on us. We want to be truly honest with you, our friends, and we won't hide our struggles, but so far, praise God, they have been few.
Please pray for us as we have our first "real" youth meeting tonight and have to teach a lesson. Also, we are having a bonfire Friday night as our first event, so please pray that that will go well.
In Christ,
Dan and Hilary
Well, first of all we left Houghton a week ago Saturday. That was an adventure and a half, and I don't mean the good kind. All of our packing and transporting our stuff took HOURS longer than we thought it would. We intended to arrive at Lisbon at 5:00 pm. We left Houghton at 5:30. The car was packed so full that Hilary was driving, because her legs are shorter and it made more room. Well, after we ran into a parade and ran around the route for almost an hour trying to find SOMEONE who could give us directions (note to the world: Parade routes should NOT block important highway junctions) Hilary was too shaken and upset to drive anymore. So guess who had to drive with his legs all cramped up? You guessed it, Dan did!
We FINALLY found someone who could tell us how to get where we needed to go, and we got back on the road and headed for McDonald's, the only restaurant that we knew where it was on our journey. We were STARVING by that point, only to find out that... this particular Ronald only accepts cash. So we backtracked to an ATM, got cash, and finally got our food. Safe at last, right? WRONG. Things continued to go badly for us, as Hilary was even clumsy enough to spill salt in her Sprite. Gross!
Somewhere around 11:30 at night, we finally pulled into the parking lot of the church that will be home sweet home for us for the next ten weeks. And it will be a home for us. Even though we're living in a Sunday School classroom that has been turned into an apartment, it is one of the most homey places we've been. For one thing, the people here are amazingly welcoming and friendly. For another, they decorated this place better than our own apartment is decorated. All the colors even match!
Our time here has gone much better than our trip here. Monday we spent acclimating and unpacking, but Tuesday was our first youth meeting. Yikes! There were about 18 or so youth, and the first meeting was very low key. We shared our testimonies and had pizza. We are getting to know most of the youth by name, and are so excited to serve here. They seem like a good group... no rotten apples. They are very fun loving. We feel like God is calling us to help them go deeper, and with His help we want to do so. We've decided to focus on "story" as our theme for the summer. We want to teach them that they each have their own unique story and place in God's kingdom. We'll be using Jesus' parables to help us acheive that, starting tonight with the Good Samaritan.
We've also gotten involved with many other things going on around the church. Hilary helped out with MOPS (that's mothers of preschoolers) one morning as a glorified jungle gym. Who would have thought that three preschoolers could take her down? We've also helped the pastor's wife with a fundraiser for the local YFC, attended a young adults meeting, and helped out with VBS planning. This church, for its small size, has a ton of activities going on. Hilary has also gone to a Wesleyan Women's meeting and a prayer group, and that doesn't even touch the surface of some of the other things this church has to offer. There is truly something for everyone. We feel very blessed to be a part of the church here. Someone said that this is a good "starter church" and that's true. We hope that we can learn so much during our time here.
We don't want to make it sound like it's all peaches and cream and roses, but so far we have had a truly blessed time. Even when Dan was very sick for several days, it was like God's hand was on us. We want to be truly honest with you, our friends, and we won't hide our struggles, but so far, praise God, they have been few.
Please pray for us as we have our first "real" youth meeting tonight and have to teach a lesson. Also, we are having a bonfire Friday night as our first event, so please pray that that will go well.
In Christ,
Dan and Hilary
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)